Jun 20, 2003 - The Hulk
Written by John Kenneth Fisher

Review, Recap, whatever, this movie blew. It tried, and there was so much in it that I give them credit for, but in the end, it's a decent hour and a half movie stretched into two and a half hours of tedium and incomprehensible plotpoints. [read Review]

Feb 20, 2003 - The Patriot
Written by John Kenneth Fisher

A soldier's son is murdered by an enemy commander, after which we watch him take revenge on the commander's troops, and finally the commander himself, in a bloody man to man dual set against a larger battle. Change 'British' to 'Klingon', it could well be Star Trek III. [read Review]

Dec 09, 2002 - 8 Mile
Written by Michelle Malone

The abrasive Eminem is yet another singer / rapper turned actor trying to gain respect in the movie industry. Many are referring it to a contemporary 'Saturday Night Fever', yet this movie has all the ambition of a cheesy Elvis movie. [read Review]

Apr 28, 2002 - The Faculty
Written by Claire Smuga

If you're not bothered by gaping plot holes, there's plenty of yummy cheesy goodness in the Faculty. It's goofy enough to keep watching. Especially if you're a nerd who likes nerdy science fiction movies. [read Review]

Apr 21, 2002 - Horror Hotline ... Big Head Monster
Written by Claire Smuga

While I can't say that I wholeheartedly recommend Horror Hotline ... Big Head Monster, it might be fun for a rainy night when you've got time to kill and a bunch of people over. It's not a great movie. It's not even a good movie, but it's got a charm all its own. [read Review]

Apr 15, 2002 - Dead Man
Written by Claire Smuga

So Dead Man is, as I've said, about a guy, and bad things happen to him, and it just gets worse and worse. But he changes, he adapts. That's putting it a bit simplistically. And it's not actually what the movie's about at all. But what is it about then? Huh. Well. Um. Okay. [read Review]

Apr 07, 2002 - Resident Evil (Second Review)
Written by Claire Smuga

The cinematography is decent, it's solidly watchable, and there are many individual parts of this movie that were really entertaining. But they don't add up to a cohesive whole. [read Review]

Mar 30, 2002 - Death to Smoochy (Second Review)
Written by Claire Smuga

This movie is a dark comedy. It is a dark comedy that can be formally analyzed in terms of story arc, color composition, and most importantly character development. Since it can be formally analyzed, I think I'm gonna review it that way. [read Review]

Mar 15, 2002 - Death to Smoochy
Written by Peter J. Caballero

The commercials for Danny Devito's new movie, Death to Smoochy, are slightly misleading. While it looks like a film simply about one man's quest for revenge, there are many different layers and plot threads coming together in this offbeat dark comedy. [read Review]

Mar 14, 2002 - Resident Evil
Written by Peter J. Caballero

With its well handled atmosphere and avoidance of MTV-style editing, this movie was much better than I expected. A little slow at times, but definitely one of the better video game adaptations made. [read Review]

Mar 10, 2002 - Welcome to Eltingville
Written by Peter J. Caballero

The cartoon focuses on four club members, and their endless quest for comic books, sci-fi, horror, role-playing, movies, and inane trivia. They're the worst aspects of every fanboy, which can make for some volatile situations, as anyone caught in the middle of a heated Enterprise vs. Star Destroyer debate can tell you. [read Review]

Mar 03, 2002 - Legally Blonde
Written by Claire Smuga

This movie isn't at all about being realistic. There are cartoons out there that have more realism than this movie. This movie is a light, fluffy comedy. Leave everything you know about the real world behind when you watch this one. [read Review]

Feb 24, 2002 - Moulin Rouge!
Written by Claire Smuga

If Moulin Rouge were a painting, it would be a Jackson Pollock. Splashy and colorful, intricate when you look at it closely, but sort of tangled and jumbled from far away. On a big screen, you get moments of both the tangle and the intricacy. A smaller screen might just be too small. [read Review]

Feb 17, 2002 - The Royal Tenenbaums
Written by Claire Smuga

The Royal Tenenbaums is a really subtle comedy. It's the type of movie that characterizes its characters with careful shots and turns of phrase rather than hitting the audience over the head with exposition. And to me, it was actually funny, too. [read Review]

Feb 10, 2002 - Brotherhood of the Wolf
Written by Claire Smuga

This may well be the best French secret society, romance, costume drama, kick-boxing, werewolf, buddy movie of the year. It's certainly the best one to star a Hawaiian martial artist as a Mohawk indian in France. [read Review]

Feb 09, 2002 - Queen of the Damned
Written by John Kenneth Fisher

I think the filmmakers truly wanted to do the story right, and were unwilling to ruin the source material in order to save the movie. In the end, that fear just caused them to ruin both. [read Review]

Feb 02, 2002 - The Count of Monte Cristo
Written by Claire Smuga

I must admit that I wasn't looking forward to seeing the Count of Monte Cristo. I felt that it was my duty, as I see all movies based on the works of Alexandre Dumas. Fortunately, it was good, and I can go back to seeing Dumas films without trepidation. [read Review]

Jan 26, 2002 - Gosford Park
Written by Clare Smuga

There are some good things and some bad things about Gosford Park. Hopefully, by the end of the review, I'll have sorted them out and decided whether the over-all movie was good or bad. That's the tough part. [read Review]

Nov 17, 2001 - The Man Who Wasn't There
Written by Claire Smuga

People just don't make enough good film noir thrillers anymore. Thank goodness the Coen brothers are here to rectify the situation. [read Review]

Nov 03, 2001 - The One
Written by Claire Smuga

It was such a good idea. The problem with action movies staring Jet Li is that there really isn't anyone out there who could look challenging when fighting him. This movie tries to solve that problem by having Jet Li be both the bad guy AND the good guy. Which, in principle, SHOULD be a good idea. [read Review]

Oct 27, 2001 - Mulholland Drive
Written by Claire Smuga

David Lynch is not bound by the same rules as other directors. He can pretty much do whatever he wants. It doesn't have to make sense. That's the attitude to take with you into his films. Nothing has to make sense. It'll make your brain hurt if you try to make sense of it. [read Review]

Oct 16, 2001 - Zoolander (Second Review)
Written by John Kenneth Fisher

It's hard to pull a movie like Zoolander off, but Ben Stiller's bizarrely in-joke filled satire works, and works quite well at that. [read Review]

Oct 14, 2001 - Iron Monkey
Written by Claire Smuga

What I really liked about this movie was that, although it had a plot - a nice, simple, easy-to-follow plot - I really felt that I didn't have to pay attention to it. I could really just sit back and stare at the screen and not think about anything, anything at all. Sure, the downside to seeing Iron Monkey is having to ask for a ticket to see a movie called "Iron Monkey," but it's all uphill after that! Honest. [read Review]

Oct 05, 2001 - Zoolander
Written by Claire Smuga

Perhaps the most perfect thing about Zoolander is that it has no pretensions about being a high quality film that will be talked about for decades. Instead, it's just entertaining, and for that, I salute it. [read Review]

Sep 29, 2001 - Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust
Written by Claire Smuga

Hand drawn and gorgeous, showing how beautiful animation can be, this is one of the best movies I've seen in a long time. [read Review]

Sep 22, 2001 - Tori Amos' Strange Little Girls
Written by John Kenneth Fisher

Another disappointing release in what is becoming more and more clearly a career well past it's prime. [read Review]

Sep 17, 2001 - The Musketeer
Written by Claire Smuga

It's always a bad sign when the main character of a film cannot pronounce his own name. Learn from that. [read Review]

Sep 05, 2001 - Ghosts of Mars
Written by Peter J. Caballero

Pretty much just your standard scifi action film, but still a fun movie with a likeable cast. [read Review]

Sep 01, 2001 - Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back
Written by Gregory Butera

Too much reliance on sight gags and parody, and lacking the cleverness that has been the hallmark of Kevin Smith's previous films. [read Review]

Jun 18, 2001 - Tomb Raider
Written by John Kenneth Fisher

Good acting, writing, and concept, rendered nearly unwatchable by wretched direction and editing. [read Review]

Sep 04, 1999 - The Matrix
Written by Peter J. Caballero

Plenty of action, sharp FX and a unique premise, but with an emphasis on action over logic. [read Review]

Aug 08, 1999 - The Decay Of Modern Day Cinema
Written by Gregory Butera

We've got top notch computer effects which really don't even phase me anymore, and stories that are so transparent they fall apart, and this is to be the future of moviemaking? [read Review]

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